On the same train

Breakfast:  Yogurt, granola bar

Morning Snack: Strawberries

Lunch: Chicken salad sandwhich, cheeze-it's, 5 pretzles

Afternoon Snack: 2 clemetines

Dinner: Bowl of blackbeans, chips, salsa and one nacho

Boring day today. I worked both jobs and realized that I might be getting too old for this. In my case the hard core cash is lovely and the tiredness from working two jobs is just a side step.

Starting something new

Daily Eats


Breakfast: PB&J Sandwhich on WW toast, banana, coffee

Morning Snack: Laughing Cow Cheese wedge, saltine crackers

Lunch: Can of soup, saltine crackers, oatmeal cookie

Afternoon Snack: 2 clementines, WW tortilla with chicken salad

Dinner: Weight Watchers receipie for cheesesteak, large salad with ranch and balsamic dressing, boiled eggs, cheddar cheese.


While I could have made some better choices today in my food, I think over all it was a descent day. I should have skipped the ranch on my salad for dinner, but it just tasted sooo good! I honestly believe that by tracking my food everyday it is going to help me tremdously. We shall see. By no means will I be perfect...I mean besides food I am perfect (who am I kidding!). But if I want to live a healthy life, I have to start somewhere.

5 things I know right now......

1. I need to loose weight. I feel like I have given up on my personal goal of loosing weight when I got comfy back in a relationship. The good thing is that my significant other ("that guy") wants to eat healthier. So hopefully doing it together will empower me. Or so I hope

2. I love vacations. They make you step away for that moment in time from all reality in life. Depending on where you go, you almost feel like there is no worries, no adult decisions have to be made and your taken away from somewhere that doesn't consist of the walls of your home or work. I need more vacations. My body screams for more vacations.

3. I am not happy at my job. I dont have a career, I have a job that simply pays the bills and gives me a purpose everyday. I am kinda tired of it. I want a career, something I love going towards everyday. But, that has to start somewhere and I think I know the only person that can change it is me.

4. I am realizing that my tastes change over the years. The older I get the more simple life is for me. I no longer crave shopping without a purpose. When I was younger I use to buy something just because it was on sale so that I didn't have to walk out of the store empty handed. Now I realize that I have to have some kind of purpose to spend money. That one dollar I spent on those stupid earrings could have gone towards a mortgage on an awesome house. I'm to the age where growing up is a reality. And she delivers one hell of a bitch slap. I'm ready to make some serious life decisions. I'm ready to move forward in life. I have also realized that my path in life might not be what I originally thought it would be, and I'm starting to be okay with that.

5. I am happy. "That Guy" makes me happy. I make myself happy. I know that happiness comes from within and is something that has to start with me. I determine my happiness and I have decided that I will from this point on. And, perhaps, I shall share it all along the way with you, who ever you are!

Mucho love!

You want me to eat what?!?

Another glorious night at the ballpark in did I mention, 106 degree weather! I knew this time we had to tackle to "Boomstick".... 2 feet of glorious hot dog smothered in, onions, chili, cheese and jalapeños. None the less I knew we had to eat one. Well we did. and it was great. I honestly wasn't super full when we were done but the meal itself was tasty! On the other hand I think we are bad luck. Second game we have been to and our Rangers got slaughtered.

We came, we saw, we conquered!

Bad Boys II Helps me through my day

You ever have one of those moments when you want to rub your ears and say "woooosa". Well i do. Most certainly all the time...b ut certainly not enough to do this stupid act. Just plain stupid.

Frustrations that shouldn't be there

There are many obstsacles that people face in life, and majority of the time the choice that everyone makes, is not something that all their family, friends and perhaps strangers would agree with. But guess what, NONE OF THAT MATTERS!!! One of the biggest things I have learned in life it to make decisions, choices on which path to take and commit yourself to doing things that YOU want to do. Your friends and family will have their opinions (which in my case I wish would be kept to themselves), but someone else's opinion cannot dictate what you do in life. You make your own path, you decide which turns to take and you committ yourself to doing things that you love. I have made a decision to be with someone who caused me emotional pain a while ago. At first you would ask "why be with them again", and I can only say that the emotional pain that I endured a while back did nothing more than make me a stronger, more independent, loving and caring individual. While it was pain in the moment, it is now a growing pain, a lesson learned and something I am thankful that I faced. I have grown ALOT in the past two years and I wish some people would realize that. Perhaps those that are meant to witness my growth and those that don't see it, need to remove thier blinders. I am who I am. if you don;t like it, I feel sorry for you. Sometimes you have to have that arogant attitude to make it through the day.

I will continue to live my life the way I want. Fill it with people I love, people I want to spend the rest of my life with, goals and ambitions I have set and one hell of a bucket list. I have some very exciting things coming up in the next few months that I am head over heels excited about! I'm going to Vegas to celebrate my best friends birthday with friends and the love of my life, I'm in love with the man I have never fallen out of love with, I'm standing in as the "Best Man" in my older brother's wedding and I am going to try and book as many little get aways that I can!. Life can be exciting, as long as you make everyday fun! I will make the commitment to not be too serious (okay maybe I need some guidance on that once and awhile).

Lots o' Love

-Dirty D

Absense makes the heart grow fonder....

When someone sits down and they tells you that life is a roller coaster, listen to them. They know what they are talking about. Life is certainly a journey. It is a path that you have no control over. Luck, love, destiny, and fate control your life. You just have to hold on and enjoy the ride. I feel like I have been through the ringer and went a complete circle. You think your life is going one way. But in all reality it heads the total opposite direction. The past two years have been insane. I have become a different person. I have experienced a completely different lifestyle and became the most independent person I have ever been. I can honestly say that right now I am the woman that I have always wanted to be. Every aspect of my life is set, except for career wise, but that will come in time.  This I know for sure.

I have had someone I n my life completely reach out to me and tell me something that I Have been waiting 2 years to hear. “I’m excited about feeling normal again and doing what makes me feel good and what is right, which is being with you.” Bamm. Just like that my whole world changed. I sat in a hotel room and cried. I didn’t cry because I was sad, I cried because I was happy. I know this time around its going to be completely different. We are adults now, we know what we want, we have been out there dating, meeting new people and realize what we knew the first time around, we are completely meant to be together. This time around I am a stronger person, I am a confident person and I am someone that will be the girlfriend that he deserves to have. I just pray and hope that he is willing to make the changes too to have a solid relationship. If he is committed he will, and if he doesn’t, than I know that I can walk away and be okay.

So I sit here in Waco, all by myself at a work conference. I am seriously about to fall asleep. I am going to these conferences for a certification that I have to obtain. The funny thing about it thought, is that every topic that they bring up, DOESN’T RELATE TO ME! I sooo want to crawl into bed right now and fall asleep. What doesn’t help is that I have self diagnosed myself with ADD. I can’t focus on one thing at all and I think that is what had made me out to be a worry wort. I’ll start one thing and an hour later I have picked up or touched about three or four other projects. Good lord! What am I going to do with a house! I am sitting here and I can’t stop moving. I have bitten off all my nails, all I can think about it when am I eating next and why the hell Is my phone acting up. It’s going to meet a wall pretty soon at a high velocity rate! It is a piece of shit. Holy Crap! I thought the Android was suppose to be the high tech phone out there. I hate it! And somehow I just managed to figure out that my messages don’t work, I can’t even see the ones that I am sending out. Now, by phone won’t even turn on. Now I have to find a sprint store close to have all this fixed before I go to Corpus Christi tomorrow. I hope going to the store is not a headache. I hope I can simply walk in there, tell them “I have to walk out with a working phone” and let them work their magic! And just like that Sprint has become GOD in my world….well for the moment. I successfully drove back to my hotel with a working phone….well a working phone with no contacts! Sucka!